Possible - impossible post?

A number of things arise in my life - unanticipated.  Here are some questions that were asked of me

• which one comes first? love of self or love of neighbour ?
• is it possible to not love oneself and still love one's neighbour ?
• is it possible to not love one's neighbour and love oneself ?

At the same time I thought of a triangle of mysteries - never to be solved by science:

• how can time begin ?
• what is gravity ?
• and how about choice ?

I noted a maverick single word to sum up Christ - not Christianity - Christianity is summed up as conflict. Christ I will sum up as 'information'. Christ is bigger than Christianity. Christ embraces all the Anointed in all times and places. What is Anointed is of Christ - they are the same word. This is a tautology.

Time is for ever and each moment is for ever. They are captured in what used to be known as the Doomsday Book. O bother, said Winnie the Pooh! This is a distraction. Doomsday or not, there is a need for justice. What can be good if there is no justice? Time is just - we each get the same allocation. Except for the people who play the stock market - where money, currency (!think about that word!) plays a game of thinking it has time under its control. We are called to redeem the time - a moment may redeem 50 years.

Gravity is grave and heavy, the weight of glory. If indeed it is the necessary minimum organization for the observance of the second law of thermodynamics - a remarkable suggestion, then it is also related to information. I wonder if we gravitate towards things? There is a time for every delight under heaven, says the preacher. Draw me to you, he writes in his love poem. We are drawn to that tree of redemption that is as unavoidable as a black hole. The wicked is drawn into this net. If with the preacher, we let our heart be drawn into wine, the results may be less than a wine of salvation. What emerges beyond Hawking radiation?

As to choice - this is the mystery of consciousness and its effect on quantum superposition. By what will is creation not rolled up and the Doomsday come?  Surely it is more than a 'store of negative entropy', as Stafford Beer intimated in some early writing of his. Word it is that was 'in the beginning'. Sacrifice it is that was before the beginning. Love it is that is now and ever shall be. As it was in the beginning.

So we come to trinity: Glory - gravity - be to the Father, and to the Son and to the Holy Ghost (do you believe in ghosts! - Yes I live with one and in one an I am one in that same Ghost), as it was - time, and will be for ever, and is now in this time of choice.

Is there then a priority to love? Must one love oneself? I am not a professional psychologist, but I think the answer is yes. How is such self love disturbed? I am afraid we know how to disturb more than we know how to love.

My immediate reaction to that first set of questions is: there is a catch-22. How can I love myself when I am so angry? And I do ask the Potter "why have you made me thus?" And He answers me: "I  made you thus, beloved, so that my glory might be known in you."

And I, like Job, have found this answer sufficient and filling. Job dies ‘sated’ because he has been given his portion in Hashem himself. It is his and no other’s.